Archives: Recordings

Call No. 1527

191 seconds

Hi. I’m calling from Rochester, New York. That’s far, far upstate in Western New York.

Let’s see. I’m in my study. I’m actually just getting ready to teach my very last online class, and I’ve actually asked the class to think about what is the sound of a pandemic, or what is the sound of this pandemic, or what does the sound of your pandemic? And one of the assignments I gave them was to reflect on this question and then contribute to some archives about the current pandemic. So this is my, one of my contributions.

It’s beautiful outside. Spring is popping here. It’s early May. Everything is green and lush. It’s gray and rainy and actually getting a little cold. We even had snow last week, but the spring is really coming and it’s so necessary and so hopeful.

My study itself is actually in total disarray because we’ve had an invasion of carpenter ants, I believe. So, I’ve been turning over everything. There’s a trunk up on its side. There’s a guest bed in here, that’s, all the blankets are taken off, because I’ve been trying to kill lots of carpenter ants, which has been deeply ironic, cause it feels like some kind of message about, how you can’t keep the chaos out, no matter how hard you try. And you can’t keep nature out either.

I’m looking forward to hearing what my students have to say about the sound of the pandemic. They are spread across the United States and the world. Some are still here in Rochester, some are in China. And I just know that the experience has played out really differently for each of them.

I’ve been really grateful to be here with my husband and my daughter, to be gardening, to have access to outdoor space, to not be stuck in a tiny, small space and maybe not even to be in a place where the lockdown is really harsh. So yesterday we planted a Witch Hazel tree, a cherry tree and asparagus, and I don’t know if there’s anything that’s more helpful or more future oriented than planting new plants. I’m really excited to see those live and thrive and evolve in the years to come. Thanks.

Call No. 1497

301 seconds

Hi, I guess, I’m from New York, which is super fun, right? If you’ve been paying attention to the news, it’s fantastic living here right now. Pretty much every day, it felt terrible. I’m from here originally and I’ve lived here my whole life. And I’ve lived through all the pretty intense situations that the city has had to go through. 9/11, financial crisis. It’s a lot, living here, but it’s great at the same time. When it’s great, it’s really great. And when it’s not great, it’s pretty, pretty terrible, right? It’s like a weird, abusive relationship.

I live by myself right now. My roommate went to go stay with her boyfriend in another state, and I don’t live with my boyfriend, so it’s just me here. And I’ll talk out loud to myself as if someone else was here. I’m responsible for literally everything, you know, cooking, cleaning, waking up, functioning like a person.

I fall asleep at probably four in the morning now. I used to wake up at 6:00 am for work. Now I’m going to sleep when I’m normally getting ready to start my day, and that is my new normal. I have this weird sleep cycle and I wake up at nine. I’ll lay there for maybe two hours.

And every day I will cry for maybe 10 minutes. I will set a timer for two minutes and cry. So I don’t spend the entire day crying. I’ve been lucky enough to not lose anybody in any of this, to somehow be spared from the experience of this virus so directly in my life, but I do have a friend who is a nurse, and I work for a medical institution. So I can’t really escape it. It’s just there all the time. So sometimes I just cry, because I think about people who are really going through a lot and are really suffering and how maybe the new normal isn’t going to be so normal.

And I’m worried that this is never going to end. Even though factually that doesn’t happen that way, it just feels like that. And I’m hoping it ends really soon, so I can stop feeling the sense of dread every single day. It’s kind of hard.

But sometimes it’s not. Sometimes I will play music and dance around, and I’m okay for maybe half of the day and I’ll cry for the rest of it. So I guess like everything else, nothing really makes sense. And there’s no real normal in any of this. And finding a normal in this has been complicated and anxiety inducing, and sometimes I just wish this was a really bad dream and I’ll wake up and none of it happened. Right? I’m sure I’m not the only person that feels like that.

Anyway, it is 2:30 in the morning and, yeah, I’m going to go be awake for another two hours and wait for the birds to tell me to go to sleep.

Call No. 1460

431 seconds

Hi. It’s around almost three o’clock where I’m at. I’m in Pennsylvania. I left New York City about a month and a half, maybe more, a little bit longer than that, and came back to PA. So I’m with my family again, and I’m in my childhood bedroom, which is an adult bedroom now. But this whole thing is really weird and I feel like I don’t take the time to step back and think about how I’m feeling.

My dad is a doctor. So I guess I’m scared for him every time he goes to work. I mean, he’s older now. And then my middle brother, he has had two kidney transplants and he’s only 21, so severely immunocompromised. So not only do I fear every day for my dad, but I also fear for when he comes home to my brother. And I think that’s something that I keep very subconsciously hidden. I’m a big believer in, I feel like I need to be the strong one, I need to be the one that keeps everything together. But, these are things that I do worry about every day. My dad takes off his clothes before he comes in the house and it’s a whole process. And I know all the other health care workers are going through the same thing, and I’m really appreciative for all of them.

But even just speaking to my own personal experience, I kind of was just getting into a place in my life where everything was working out for once. A lot of blood, sweat, tears and time was finally like bringing me to a place that I was feeling really secure. Financially, socially, even just romantically just getting out there more. And so I feel like this is something that I’ve always wanted to be in that place. And I put a lot of work into that. And I really was looking forward to, you know, now getting to travel more because I was in a more comfortable place in my life.

And so at that first when I came home with all this stuff going on, I felt like I was upset about that and I still am, but I was missing my life and I still do, and I miss my friends in New York, but it’s kind of like, that was my life as I knew it. Because life’s not going to be the same anymore.

And I really enjoy all the time that I’ve gotten to spend with my family now. I don’t think I ever would have gotten the chance to spend this much quality time with them ever again, just because there’s not a period that I would be at home for this long. So I’m really cherishing these moments, but I feel like at this point, for me personally, it’s not about so much the sadness of missing what life was, but it’s the sadness and, you know, the unknown of what life will be or what kind of life there will be to come back to. And I think that’s the scariest part for me personally, just because the unknown is so scary.

And now with the economy being really bad and everything else, I mean, I don’t even know if I’m going to stay in New York. And I know a lot of people will be moving out. And just this huge unknown factor. And I feel like I’m more sad every day about the future, almost, just because it’s so… For me, it’s so sad to see everything that I was trying to build. And now it’s like, are my friends going to be okay? Or, you know, my job. Thankfully, I’m still employed. I know that above all I’m the most grateful, the most thankful, that every day I wake up and I’m alive and I’m healthy and that my family’s alive and healthy, but I feel like as the day goes on, it kind of feels like I’m living the same day over and over and over again. And it’s just like, I get so sad about the future. Because it’s so, it’s such a big question mark.

And I know that as a society, you know, humanity will make it through this and everybody on the other side of it will be stronger. And you know, we’re going to make it through this. Like, I feel like just lately I’ve been having a hard time with, seeing that.

I was actually kind of nervous to call in. Even though I talk to people every day at work, talking to strangers is not something that would be in my comfort zone, but I’m really glad that I called in because I’ve been having a hard time sleeping and kind of just getting everything off my chest really helps. So thank you and hopefully this contributed in some way.

Call No. 1446

201 seconds

Hi. I’m in beautiful nature in upstate New York. Lucky to have a house here, surrounded by trees. The sun is shining and the trees have their red buds out. It all looks golden.

Yesterday I volunteered and I packaged and delivered food to people who aren’t as lucky as I am. And, yeah, every, package that I arranged, went to somebody who was waiting for it and who was possibly hungry. Somebody who was already struggling, possibly even before Covid came, and waiting for this meal to arrive to fill a hungry belly.

And, in my next part of the shift, I actually delivered some of the meals to the people who were waiting for them. And, it broke my heart to see how many people were, like, living in really poor, broken down conditions and accepting this important thing. And that just reminded me that people are in very different situations in this America that we live in. And we, the ones who are luckier or the ones who’ve ended up in a better spot, need to make sure that nobody gets left behind.

And this is a time for us to help one another and be there for one another. And come together. And, also a time to reflect on how we are living our lives. And maybe this is an amazing opportunity for us to return to life better. Yeah.

Call No. 1438

205 seconds

Being in isolation together with my family, a family of four, has been definitely an experience with ups and downs and high emotions. I want to talk only about the positive things. The positive things are, that this time capsule gave us a good outlook and opportunity to reflect what we do, what we have done so far, and how we usually live, and made us come to the conclusion that, when this all is over, we definitely want to change a few things.

I think that our lifestyle has to be more environmentally friendly. More healthy to the Earth and for the Earth. And it’s important that we act because I think that this crisis is the beginning of something that we will experience more and more, because we all know that the change of climate is coming rapidly and will affect us all.

It is a opportunity for us to really look at things that have to be changed. I hope that politically we will learn from this and I hope that the election will take place and the democracy will be strong and I hope that the leadership will also change in the USA. That’s very important because we can see with this crisis that the leadership is just not doing its job.

Last but not least, how is our life going to continue? We don’t know how will it continue. But, we are basically, our families thinking of leaving the big city and spending time in nature and living in the nature and doing something we have been talking about for a very long time.

So this was my version. Obviously I could talk for hours and I hope I was able to contribute something worth it to your podcast. Bye.

Call No. 1422

139 seconds

Hello! I’m in Santa Clara, and this has been a long haul, but I’m actually sitting in my makeshift office.

I work from home right now. I’m a tax preparer, and fortunately I am able to continue with my work with a few adjustments, but I’m grateful for that. I want to keep helping people through their taxes. It’s been a challenge. I pray for everyone that is not as fortunate as I am and that can make it through this without a lot of trouble. A lot of pain, and heartbreak.

It’s a dreary day but I have my dog laying next to me, and I’m getting ready to log on and do some work for the day, and then enjoy the evening with my husband and family. I think we are strong and it looks like we’re going to pull through this, and I hope that anyone who needs help can reach out, and anyone who’s ready and willing to help, I’m grateful for those people that are in the frontline and I hope that all goes well.

Everybody stay together, stay home, stay safe, be well, and I love my country and I love all of you. Have a wonderful day. Bye Bye.

Call No. 1318

190 seconds

Hello. I am calling in from Chicago today. I’m in my high school bedroom. This is probably the most amount of time that I’ve spent in my high school bedroom since I graduated high school five years ago. But at this point, I’m thankful that it hasn’t been covered it into an exercise room. Because I live alone, so I decided to socially distance with my family. So it’s been, it’s been nice.

Something that’s happened recently is, I found out that an ex partner of mine was dating somebody new and didn’t tell me, and we were still talking. And so I found that out during quarantine, which, you know, it’s never a convenient time to experience heartbreak, but it’s an extremely interesting time to experience heartbreak now, because I find that while I’m heartbroken, I also feel guilt for feeling heartbreak. Because really my heart should be breaking for everybody else around the world whose jobs are disappearing and you know, who are looking down the neck of what seems to be a long amount of time of uncertainty. And really, I’m very fortunate and very lucky, because I still have my job, because I have a family that I can surround myself with, that, you know, I have so many, so many blessings.

So, you know, a lot of times when people experience heartbreak, they try to distract themselves. They surround themselves with friends and activities. And I think what makes this harder is that I’m just still my high school bedroom and I will be for a while. But at least I have a bedroom.

Anyway, sending love to anybody who needs it. I know we will get through. Bye.